Trusting God

I underwent the first of several radiation treatments to begin “setting” some of the rib bones yesterday. They’re also aiming at part of my left hip, so i may lose my “new walk” (if youve seen it, you may not miss it…lol). It could take only a few sessions to begin seeing results. I’m marked with squares, x marks and I got 6 tattoos today. I’d show you all the markings, but I’d have to lift my shirt and only a few would enjoy that (ok, really no one would enjoy it, so I’ll keep my shirt on). Hopefully zapping the lesions will allow my legs to move without pain (or as much pain) and keep the ribs from moving. Hmmm, that sounds like two results from one treatment. This procedure will be daily and should go rather quickly. Oh, about the tattoos, I was wondering if you thought I was joking… I did get six, but they’re medical ones, small dots. I didnt get to pick a dolphin, small flower, skull or Harley Davidson tattoo (should have took a picture of the grin i had typing that line out).

I also saw my Kidney Specialist and my kidneys are basically back to normal. Will follow-up in three months unless chemo tanks them or something.

Last but not least, visited with some really good people I work with yesterday. Many have called, sent texts, messaged on Facebook and asked about me. There’s a big line (the lion is later) of them jumping at the bit to help in some way. I’ve learned that the blog is being read and so I hope if you get something from it, you’ll realize that the message or encouragement comes from God, not me. If you don’t need it, maybe someone you know could use it, so share it with them.

The following thoughts came from my devotion reading yesterday (the actual devotion series is written by a member of the military on dealing with Hope after a traumatic event) but these are my takes after reading his. If interested, the series in on YouVersion & I can get the title to it. I wanted to share and keep you in where I’m at. Sorry, this update is a little longer, but felt it was good to get it all out.

…but those who trust in the Lord will lack no good thing….  Psalms 34:10

Trusting God can be tough. We like to do a walk-through first, see the hills, valleys, potholes and obstacles.  We want to map out the curves, slow-downs and straight paths ahead of a race. No surprises on the journey, we just want to find the finish line. God says, “Climb on, I’m driving” and many of us at first eagerly jump on. Trusting God gets tough quick sometimes. Others around us take different routes, whether they are allowing God to lead or not, while others drive their own recless a d fun looking routed and we can find doubt sneaking in if not careful. “…If we continue to trust, we will lack no good thing…” This flies in the face of “I know better” or “let me do it” which most of us seem to have inherently live by shortly into our lives.

Lacking no good thing doesn’t mean you don’t experience bumps,  falls or spills either. God leads over or around those obstacles as He sees fit. We are counseled around those too much for us and then over those that are a little scary, yet fun once it’s accomplished,  in order to teach us. He teaches reliance when he can see the hill isn’t too big, but we cannot. He teaches trust when He knows we can, but we do not believe the same. He teaches love when we get half-way, get scared and fall over. In those moments,  our Father lifts us, tends the scrape along with the hurt (those two are separate but connected) and then guides us again. God cares for the physical scrapes, the things that hurt us physically but also the “hurt”. These are the voices of doubt or shame that surface after mishaps.  Feelings that you failed God, you should have done better,  or you are not good enough. God is not interested in you living with such thoughts, so He will heal them also, along with the physical scrapes we encounter. 

God knows the road you’re on as well as the road ahead and it’ll be a far better ride with him. It’s always your choice.